"I can train any dog in five minutes. It's training the owner that takes longer."
-- Barbara Woodhouse

"I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her."
-- Ellen DeGeneres

"The poet is a man who lives at last by watching his moods. An old poet comes at last to watch his moods as narrowly as a cat does a mouse."
-- Henry David Thoreau

"Bragging is not an attractive trait, but let's be honest. A man who catches a big fish doesn't go home through an alley."
-- Ann Landers, US advice columnist

"To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs."
-- Aldous Huxley

"Alice came to a fork in the road. 'Which road do I take?' she asked. 'Where do you want to go?', responded the Cheshire cat. 'I don't know.' Alice answered. 'Then,' said the cat, 'it doesn't matter."
-- Lewis Carroll "Alice in Wonderland."

"A dog wags its tail with its heart"
-- Martin Buxbaum

"A hungry dog hunts best."
-- Lee Trevino, US golfer

"To give your sheep or cow a large, spacious meadow is the way to control him."
-- Shunryu Suzuki (1905 - 1971) Japanese religious leader

"Here Skugg Lies snug As a bug In a rug."
-- Benjamin Franklin (1706 - 1790), An epitaph for a squirrel, 'skugg' being a dialect name for the animal. Letter to Georgiana Shipley, 26 Sept 1772

"Use what talents you possess; the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except those that sang best."
-- Henry Vandyke

"Als oude honden blaffen, is het tijd om uit te zien."
Meaning: Pay heed to the warnings of those who are experienced.Source: K. Ter Laan

"You've got to stare the cat down out of the tree."

"Je moet de kat uit de boom kijken." Meaning: You've got to let some things work out for themselves.

"Your father was a hamster and your mother smelled of elderberries!"
-- French guard
-- (Monty Python and the Holy Grail)

"I'm a mog. Half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend"
-- Barf, John Candy (Spaceballs)

"Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend, and inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
-- Groucho Marx.

"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat."
-- Lily Tomlin

"Even the lion has to defend himself against flies."
-- Anonymous

"The cat and the love you give away always come back to you."

"A tiny fly can choke a big man."
-- Solomon ibn Gabirol

"More than the calf wants to suck, the cow wants to suckle -- i.e., the teacher wants to teach more then the pupil wants to learn."
-- Rabbi Akiva

"In studying the traits and dispositions of the so-called lower animals, and contrasting them with man's, I find the result humiliating to me."
-- Mark Twain

"Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them."
-- Samuel Butler (1835-1902)

"Man is the only animal that laughs and weeps; for he is the only animal that is struck with the difference between what things are and what they ought to be."
-- William Hazlitt

"Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind- boggling amounts of excrement when you least expect it."
-- Gene Spafford, 1992

"The zoo is a place for animals to study the behaviour of human beings"
-- Unknown

"Some of my best leading men have been dogs and horses."
-- Elizabeth Taylor

"It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions."
-- Mark Twain

"Do not remove a fly from a friend's forehead with a chopstick."
-- Unknown

"Elephants never forget, but you seldom see a kangaroo with a zipper."
-- Unknown

"When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last."
-- Griffin's Thought

"A dog may bark, but his legs will never grow longer."
-- Unknown

"If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer."
-- Alfred North Whitehead

"A cat sleeps fat, yet walks thin."
-- Unknown

"My dog thinks he's human.. My cat thinks he's GOD!"
-- Unknown

"I would rather see the portrait of a dog that I know, than all the allegorical paintings they can show me in the world."
-- Samuel Johnson

"In ancient times cats were worshipped as Gods, they have not forgotten this."
-- Unknown

"No one appreciates
the very special genius
of your conversation
as the dog does."
-- Christopher Morley

"Dogs are our link to paradise. They don't know
evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a
dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to
be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not
boring--it was peace."
-- Milan Kundera

"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself."
-- Josh Billings

"Man is a dog's idea of what God should be."
-- Holbrook Jackson

"The average dog is a nicer person than the average person."
-- Andrew A. Rooney

"One reason a dog is such a lovable creature is his tail wags instead of his tongue."
-- Unknown

"Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children,
as they are already stretched and pulled
to such a length that a child cannot
do much harm one way or another."
-- Robert Benchley (1889 - 1945)

"I am I because my little dog knows me"
-- Gertrude Stein

"Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet."
-- Colette (** See really cute shirts, magnets, hats and more with this quote, with a cat or a dog. **)

"I don't mind a cat, in its place. But its place is not in the middle of my back at 4 a.m."
-- Maynard Stoddard

"Dogs eat. Cats dine."
-- Ann Taylor

"My goal in life is to become as wonderful as my dog thinks I am."
-- Toby & Eileen Green

"Qui me amat, amet et canem meum."
("Love me, love my dog.")
-- St. Bernard, A.D. 1150, "Sermo Primus"

"The dog is a religious animal. In his savage state he worships the moon and the lights that float upon the waters. These are his gods to whom he appeals at night with long-drawn howls."
-- Anatole France, "The Coming of Riquet"

"I was desperate. The swine who stole my dog doesn't realize what he did to me!"
-- Hitler, 1917, After a railroad worker in Alsace stole his terrier

"Man is a dog's idea of what God should be."
-- Holbrook Jackson

"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion"
-- Unknown

"The average dog is a nicer person than the average person."
-- Andrew A. Rooney

"To his dog, every man is King; hence the constant popularity of dogs."
-- Aldous Huxley

"Doubts are the ants in the pants of faith. They keep it awake and moving."
-- Frederick Buechner, Wishful Thinking

"Teaching a child not to step on a caterpillar is as valuable to the child as it is to the caterpillar. "
-- Bradley Millar

"Heaven goes by favour. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in."
-- Mark Twain

"Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail. What you gain at one end you lose at the other. It's like feeding a dog on his own tail. It won't fatten the dog."
-- Mark Twain, speech, 11/23/1900.

"Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can find a rock."
-- Unknown

"I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it."
-- Abraham Lincoln

"If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went."
-- Unknown

"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart."
-- Ernest Menaul

"To bathe a cat takes brute force, perseverance, courage of conviction--and a cat. The last ingredient is usually hardest to come by."
-- Stephen Baker

"Any conditioned cat-hater can be won over by any cat who chooses to make the effort."
-- Paul Corey, Do Cats Think?

"If there was any petting to be done...he chose to do it. Often he would sit looking at me, and then, moved by a delicate affection, come and pull at my coat and sleeve until he could touch my face with his nose, and then go away contented."
-- Charles Dudley Warner, "Calvin"

" 'All right,' said the Cat; and this time it vanished quite slowly, beginning with the end of the tail, and ending with the grin, which remained some time after the rest of it had gone."
-- Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland

"...the only identification that would be inscribed on any cat's collar would be 'This is the cat's cat.' "
-- Elmer Davis, "On Being Kept by a Cat"

"Of all animals, he alone attains to the Contemplative Life."
-- Andrew Lang, "On Observing His Cats"

"Like a graceful vase, a cat, even when motionless, seems to flow."
-- George F. Will

"A cat has absolute emotional honesty: human beings, for one reason or another, may hide their feelings, but a cat does not."
-- Ernest Hemingway

"A kitten is so flexible that she is almost double; the hind parts are equivalent to another kitten with which the fore part plays. She does not discover that her tail belongs to her until you tread on it."
-- Henry David Thoreau

"Cats everywhere asleep on the bookshelves like motorized bookends."
-- Audrey Thomas