"Dogs have owners, cats have staff."
Source: Dog Hause Visitor Eleanor

"There are two things for which animals are to be envied: they know nothing of future evils, or of what people say about them." -- Voltaire

"There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat."
-- Wesley Bates

"Only kings, editors, and people with tapeworm have the right to use the editorial 'we'."
-- Mark Twain

"What's the need of working if it doesn't get you anywhere? What's the use of boring around in the same hole like a worm? Making the hole bigger to stay in?"
-- Marita Bonner, "The Purple Flower," 1928.

"The fox has many tricks. The hedgehog has but one. But that is the best of all."
-- Desiderius Erasmus, (1469? - 1536) Dutch scholar, philosopher, author

"The butterfly's attractiveness derives not only from colors and symmetry: deeper motives contribute to it. We would not think them so beautiful if they did not fly, or if they flew straight and briskly like bees, or if they stung..."
-- Primo Levi, (1919 - 1987) Italian-Jewish writer, chemist

"What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly."
-- Richard Bach

"It is useless for the sheep to pass resolutions in favour of vegetarianism, while the wolf remains of a different opinion."
-- William Ralph Inge (1860 - 1954) English religious leader, author

"[Being a parent] is tough. If you just want a wonderful little creature to love, you can get a puppy."
-- Barbara Walters

"The squirrel that you kill in jest, dies in earnest."
-- Henry David Thoreau

"Nutrition . . . has been kicked around like a puppy that cannot take care of itself. Food faddists and crackpots have kicked it pretty cruelly . . ." -- Adelle Davis, (1904 - 1974) US nutritionist,

"Genius and virtue are to be more often found clothed in gray than in peacock bright."
-- Van Wyck Brooks, (1886 - 1963) US literary critic, cultural historian

"The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen."
-- Sarah Brown

"A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shared with the dog, when you are just as hungry as the dog."
-- Jack London

"One becomes a critic when one cannot be an artist, just as a man becomes a stool pigeon when he cannot be a soldier."
-- Gustave Flaubert (letter to Madame Louise Colet, August 12, 1846)

"Anyone with more than 365 pair of shoes is a pig."
-- Barbara Melser Lieberman

"If we value the pursuit of knowledge, we must be free to follow wherever that search may lead us. The free mind is not barking dog, to be tethered on a ten-foot chain."
-- Adlai E. Stevenson Jr., speech at the University of Wisconsin, Madison, October 8, 1952

"The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it."
-- Doug Larson

"It is hard to be brave, when you're only a Very Small Animal."
-- Piglet, Pooh's Little Instruction Book

"It's so much more friendly with two."
-- Piglet, Pooh's Little Instruction Book

"Real education must be limited to men who *insist* on knowing. The rest is mere sheep-herding."
-- Ezra Pound

"Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function."
-- Unknown

"Go on! Shoot me again! I enjoy it! I love the smell of burnt feathers and gunpowder and cordite!"
-- Daffy Duck

"It's always useful to know where a friend-and-relation is, whether you want him or whether you don't."
-- Rabbit, Pooh's Little Instruction Book

"Dealing with network executives is like being nibbled to death by ducks."
-- Eric Sevareid

"I like a bit of a mongrel myself, whether it's aman or a dog; it's best for every day."
-- George Bernard Shaw

"A pekingeese is not a pet dog; he is an undersized lion."
-- A.A. Milne

"There's not much you can do with a terrier, ma'am."
-- Los Angeles dog trainer

"If dogs could talk, perhaps we would find it as hard to get along with them as we do with people."
-- Karel Capek

"Animals are such agreeable friends--they ask no questions; they pass no criticisms."
-- George Eliot

"I'd rather have an inch of a dog than miles of pedigree."
-- Dana Burnet

"My little dog---a heartbeat at my feet."
-- Edith Wharton

"Children and dogs are as necessary to the welfare of the country as Wall Street and the railroads."
-- Harry S. Truman

"The world was conquered through the understanding of dogs; the world exists through the understanding of dogs."
-- Nietzche

"All knowledge, the totality of all questions and all answers is contained in the dog."
-- Kafka

"Avaunt, malignant enchanters! Avaunt, ye witchcraft working rabble!"
-- Don Quixote, to cats that leap on his nose

"Jesse has a new dog. You may have noticed that his former pets have been peculiarly unfortunate. When this dog dies every employee in the White House will be at once discharged."
-- Ulysses Grant to White house staff when his son got a Newfoundland pup, and after others of his dogs had died mysteriously

"Life is like a camel; you can make it do anything except back up"
-- Marcelene Cox

"The one absolutely unselfish friend that man can have in this selfish world, the one that never deserts him, the one that never proves ungrateful or treacherous, is his dog. . . .He will kiss the hand that has no food to offer; he will lick the wounds and sores that come in encounter with the roughness of the world. . . .When all other friends desert, he remains."
-- George G. Vest

"You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants don't help."
-- Calvin
(Yeah I know this isn't really an "animal quote," but Hobbes IS a tiger and it just made me laugh.)

"Any great truth can -- and eventually will -- be expressed as a cliche -- a cliche is a sure and certain way to dilute an idea. For instance, my grandmother used to say, 'The black cat is always the last one off the fence.' I have no idea what she meant, but at one time, it was undoubtedly true."
-- Solomon Short

"Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent."
-- Dave Barry

"This magnificent butterfly finds a little heap of dirt and sits still on it; but man will never on his heap of mud keep still..."
-- Joseph Conrad

"No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings."
-- William Blake

"I've fallen in love with my horse. It's a safer bet. We all know from my illustrious past that I should be sticking to men with four legs."
-- Sharon Stone

"If aquarium gravel is so bad for you, how come it tastes so good?"
-- Ralph Wiggum from the Simpsons

"...it takes a strong minded human to appreciate a string-minded dog!"
-- Mary Webber

"When a shepherd goes to kill a wolf, and takes his dog along to see the sport, he should take care to avoid mistakes. The dog has certain relationships to the wolf the shepherd may have forgotten."
-- Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

"Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs."
-- P. J. O'Rourke

"If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer."
-- Alfred North Whitehead

"I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse."
-- Woody Allen

"The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it."
-- Doug Larson

"You can't fight evil with a macaroni duck."
-- Arthur, from The Tick